I wish I had a regular routine for blogging. I’d love to write every day, and post several times per week. Instead, I’m more likely to let an idea bounce around in my head for a few days before I ever put anything down “on paper.” Sometimes, I’ll have entire paragraphs, certainly complete sentences, all drafted in my mind and ready to flow out of my fingertips when I finally sit down to write.
I enjoy the writing, but wonder if blogging is now causing me to neglect my journaling. There should be room for both. The two are different – writing for myself (journaling) versus for an audience (blogging). Still, that’s a lot of words! So I find that I’m not journaling like before; I used to write in my journal daily. I’ve recently started using a new pen, and am still getting the hang of lifting it from the paper at just the right moment to get a beautiful flow and pretty penmanship. My journal is sometimes on my nightstand, and then I write sitting up in bed. Lately, it’s been on the living room end table, next to my favorite seat on the couch. In the past, journaling came very naturally; now, I must choose to write for an audience of me only.
Until recently, I’ve used my iPad to do my blogging. At least, until it came time in any post to add media – then I’d move to the desktop. I’ve found that my tablet just isn’t really designed to handle WordPress – though it’s more likely operator error than anything with the website. Still, I have regular trouble with my tablet not pulling up the most recently saved draft, and more than once I’ve lost text on which I was working. I hit the SAVE button a lot! Because I’m afraid of losing my work, most of my posts have 25+ revisions!
My favorite place to write is from my corner of the couch, closest to the end table, with a lamp and box of tissues and coasters for my soda can and ice-filled glass. There’s room for a bowl of crackers or grapes too. Sometimes I’ll write from the bedroom glider I received from my mother-in-law. I also like to sit outside, but balancing the tablet on my lap with the kitten hopping up and down is a little nerve-wracking, so the patio glider doesn’t always feel safe. I like it when I pull up to the kitchen or outdoor table, but that only works if I have my wireless keyboard out. The keyboard helps, but doesn’t communicate spell-checking, so I do a lot of backspacing to fix my typing errors!
In the past two weeks, I’ve written on my new Chromebook, one that my husband won at work and gave to me. I’m the last person in our family of four to have a laptop, and I’m finding that it meets my writing needs very well!
I write because I want to tell my story. In all these years in and out of depression, I’ve asked God to use it in others’ lives, not just my own. I was doing that in the support group I facilitated at my church before we moved, but it’s been over a year since I was part of that group. So I started blogging in January as a way to share with others, like I shared with the group. To write my story, and tell about God’s faithfulness through it all, hopefully as a way to encourage others.
It’s hard to simply trust God that He’s doing that – using this blog to help others. It’s easy to get caught up in the fact that my readership is small. So how in the world could I be reaching anyone with my story? But the numbers are not the focus. The desire – the goal – is to let it be used by God. And trusting Him that He’ll get it to the people who need it.
In the meantime, I like the writing process and so I’ll sit back on the couch and type away!